We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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