ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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