He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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