she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
