If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
