either way he was missing a nipple.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
i believe in u and ur pee
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
