It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
