My vagina just recognized that song.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
We need to get me chipped asap
I pour the whiskey from now on
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
