Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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