jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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