where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
