Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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