he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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