I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
