nut hugger
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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