that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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