i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
my vag is so smooth its legendary
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
