I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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