Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
