Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
