that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Randomize
