my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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