Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
