im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
