Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
It's official drugs can't kill me
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
