should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
