I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
