So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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