the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
