My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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