i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
