I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
