she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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