belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
