The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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