i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Barsexuality is the new black.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
no you cant smoke seaweed
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
