Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
