By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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