THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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