literally had 100 drinks last night.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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