i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
