Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
