He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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