then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
This house was built for laser tag.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
