NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
