You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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