Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
