Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
