I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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