you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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