I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
